I am generally very inconsistent and in order to relax my impatient nerves I like to travel. New places, people and the feeling on being lost, gives me a high. I like food too in the most unnatural and voyeuristic manner and I often identify places with the food it offers. Being a bong there is no avoiding the traveling gene. I had started traveling with my super adventurous grandmother and though I haven’t traveled a lot, it’s fairly a good number. I don’t get to travel a lot these days. I don’t have my enthusiastic grandmother and the money to afford long trips. I miss them both. I have never actually penned any of the travel experiences, so this time I decided to put down all my travels details with my grandmother. Most of them are highly insignificant details and i dont remember the significant ones.

Manila and Hong Kong

I don’t remember anything about it. According to what I have been told, I insisted I get carried around everywhere and threw a tantrum every time I was forced to walk. My second birthday was celebrated there and the creamiest cake was ordered and the balloons had my name on it.

Mayawati (not the politician - its a place in UP)

We were put up in the middle of the jungle and our forest lodge had wooden flooring. After dark we were not allowed to come out because of the tigers in the forest. We had stayed at the Ramakrishna Mission guest house and it was looked after by my dad’s old school principal. He was the coolest sadhu/godman or whatever we are supposed to call them ever. I used to follow him like the pug in the Hutch ad and only used to leave his side when my grandmother used to force me to bed. I used to call him Shyamal da copying my father, though I was supposed to call him swamiji or something like that.

Puri

I have been to Puri 13 times in a span of 12 years. It is the mecca of middle class bongs. Though I love the place I have vowed never to go there again. Playing in the beach in semi naked state, making lame sand castles, taking pictures with strange beer guzzling way past middle age uncles, eating hot malpuas on the beach are a part of the Puri memories. But no trip of ours was complete without visiting the Jagannath Temple with the help of Chokachok. He was a panda (not the animal). Without the help of a panda it is usually impossible to get a darshan. We met Chokachok the first time we went to Puri and he was our panda for the rest of the trips as well. His duck like way of walking and the bhog and khajas made Puri visits complete. There were two famous hotels in Puri back then, one was the Victoria Lodge and the other Puri Hotel. Victoria can be compared with the newspaper Hindu and Puri Hotel with Times of India. Once we had stayed in Victoria Hotel. It was the most boring place ever. I started missing my grandmother and created a scene. Next day we changed our hotel and went to Puri hotel. I also traveled first class for the first in one of our Puri trips. Chilka and Bhuvaneshwar was also a part of our trip. Nothing spectacular, except when we sat on a boat for 2 hours on the Chilka lake to see dolphins. We could just see the tail. additionally Bhuvaneshwar is the place where I learnt Oriya. I also made a friend there and we used dance to humma humma from the movie Bombay. We had long practice sessions. On my last day, she cried because I was leaving. I didn’t really care.

Bangladesh

It was the first time I came across coca cola. I had finished an entire crate of coca cola during my stay in our family friend's house in Dhaka. Even the 5-minute flight which included filling out forms and hiding the croissants in my grandmother’s bag. I also met Utpal Dutt (veteran Bengali actor and also was in the movie Golmaal) during one of my trips in the Dhaka airport. He was like an endearing grandfather. Our family friend’s house was in the poshest area of Dhaka. Poverty in Bangladesh was never a reality to me. The house had five servants and they were all my best friends. Mornings used to go with the gardener. He even sent his daughter to play with me. We used to play house-house in the bathroom. The bathroom had a bathtub. Afternoon used to be with the housekeeper Kareem Bhai. I used do namaz with him and he got me the skullcap also. He also taught me the words. I don’t remember them now. The evening, I used to spend time with Abdul Bhai the cook and the driver. The driver taught me how to knit fishnets. Abdul Bhai’s white (curd) chicken and bhuni kichdi was the best dish I ever had. He is till the best cook that I have came across. I never found the same kind of chicken preparation ever again. Since my grandmother was from Bangladesh, she wanted explore the rural areas. We had gone to a lady’s house during the durga puja. Her son and husband were killed during the 1971 war. But she didn’t know the truth. She till had sindoor on her head and told people that they were working abroad. Also in Bangladesh I met my first crush. He was a lot older to me and he was related to our family friend. We were obsessed with the movie Satte pe Satta and used watch it over and over again. Years later I heard he is turned into a quite a loser, trying to find a job in the US by flattering his rich cousin. Also there was Benji. He was the only dog I ever liked. He was a pup when I met him for the first time in Manila. He used to follow me around everyday and used to sleep by my side. I used to take him for walks as well. When I went to Dhaka for the third time, Benji was no more.

Bangalore Mysore Trivandrum Kanyakumari

It was our south India trip. We made a brief stop at Chennai; all I remember was the musty hotel room. Mysore was brilliant and the splendour of the palace left me dumbstruck. In Vrindavan Gardens, it was hard to control my grandmother. She wanted to see everything and 9 year old me dragged her to the bus when it was just about to leave. In Bangalore, I came across a computer for the first time and had wonderful paper dosa. I also watched African Safari there. Also I bonded with a cousin who had the prettiest mother with blue eyes. She died the next year. Next year when we went again the adults explained to me how I should talk to my cousin and try to cheer her up. I have no idea how she is doing now. Also while entering the station our train collided with another train and our coach was suspended over an over bridge. We took our luggage, walked gingerly on the bridge and finally reached the station. Kanyakumari and Trivandrum I don’t remember anything except for the beach hammocks on Kovalam beach and gawking at the bikini clad firangs.

Ranchi

My grandmother’s sister and practically her entire khandaan used to stay there. Somehow it all makes sense. My grandmother’s sister’s husband was the coolest grandfather. He was the principal of a school. We used to lock ourselves in a room and he used to recite poems and famous dialogues from various films, plays and books. He used to play some really cool records as well and used to dope a lot even when he was in 50s. That’s why I loved going back to Ranchi. Now he is old and I have heard he has lost his spunk. I don’t think I want to see him again. Also I bonded a lot with my cousins there. One of them got married while I was there and during her bidaai everyone started crying. I was feeling a little stupid and excluded so I tried squeezing my eyes hard so that i could cry. Obviously it did not work.

I have visited many other places as well but because of my short attention span I don’t think I can write them at one go. Someday I will write the rest. As it is this post is far too long.

i walked into a class full of chattering and confident girls. it was my first day in a big school. i was the star of my kindergarten school. suddenly i was uprooted from my comfort zone and put in a class full of loud girls in ugly uniforms, teachers who talk with a scale in their hands. i was unsure, shy and gawky. i wanted to disappear in some corner unnoticed. but there was someone who loudly pointed at me asked the teacher, "ask her to sit next to me?" i did as i was told. i admired you from that day. you exuded confidence and you were sure about your every move and word. i was in awe of you. but i hated your friends. they used to tease, make fun of me. you always defended me but a lot of things went unnoticed. i distanced myself from u because i could not stand your friends. the entire academic year ended. my first year in that school i used to sit in the last bench, i did not make any friends and i barely got pass marks and always used to get yelled by the teachers. i hated school. the next year on the first day as i was quietly slipping to my usual corner you called me, "hey you are supposed to sit next to me!" i looked around and saw that your friends are missing. i shrugged and quietly sat next to you. later on you admitted that you hated them and they were never your friends. my six year old heart felt very happy. we have been friends ever since then. twenty years of friendship and i give you full credit for keeping it.

you have been dominating and bossy. you have always been the leader and i the reluctant and slow follower. you excelled in studies, sports, arts, music and i struggled to come out of your shadows. did i ever resent that? no never. i loved that you bossed me around, ordered me as to what i should do or not, always had your way with me. nobody replaced you. you refused to give me your noted unless i stayed over at your house and you decided when you should come and stay in my house without any invitation. its fascinating how you controlled my life. you were a friend, a sister, a mother everything. i used to come last in races but you partnered with me and i came second, that's the first and last time i got a prize in sports. you always used to be the top performer in the class. you were competitive and i barely used to pass. you supported me when i came 12th in class and you second. you taught me, inspired me that i was got followed you to accept my prize from the chief guest. you managed to lead me to become one of the top performers in the class. there has been no looking back. its funny but now i am considered as a good student. you scolded me when i refused to touch an elders feet, you scolded me when i am arrogant and anti social. even when you were busy with your marriage plans, you always found the best place to sleep for me, you ensured i get my meals in that mad house full of confusion and activity. when i lost my heels, you ensured i get them back even though you were standing on the podium and receiving the guests for your reception. i bumbled, made mistakes, refused to grow up and you forced me, lead me and dragged with the same stubborn resolute which never failed to surprise me even after all these years.

do you remember the day when we packed extra frock, underwear and ten bucks and wanted to run away from our families. finally when the school bell rang, our enthusiasm curbed, each advancing steps becomes heavy. we had too much pride to admit that it was stupidity and was waiting for the other to utter. then i saw my grandmother standing outside the gate with my favourite sweets and we forgot everything. how about the day when your brother asked us about sex and how we laughed at the disbelief on his face. the first time we stayed alone at your grandmother's house. the numerous nights that we stayed up to talk, the messes we made in the kitchen. the memories are many, some have faded, some are still fresh, some are yet to be made.

we have changed a lot over the years. i have become cynical, detached and disillusioned and you have become more passive, accepting and realist. i am self destructive and have lost all my faith but you bring stability and normalcy in my life. you show me what is to believe, trust and accept. though its too late to change but i am still well behaved in front of you. you make me better with your presence. the way you absorbed me into your family and extended family and held on to even when i showed signs of drifting apart. when i hugged your grandmother, your both aunts, your brother, mother before saying good bye i realised that the bond and love that i shared with them thanks to you remains even in your absence. the millions of 'how she came to our house when she was young' that was narrated by them makes them a part of my life even though i might not see them ever again. you are embarking on your new journey and it is impossible not to love, respect and admire you and i am sure you will be an excellent wife, mother just as you have been an excellent daughter, sister and friend. it might not be the same again but i want to see you grow old and want our children to grow together so that you them the same values that you taught me. love you more than ever.